I reached out again. I've been seeing a counselor on base. One of the bonuses of military life are the free outreach programs. Of course, they are there because military life can hard sometimes. Being away from family mixed with the many uncertainties and many flip flops of military life. I'm not quite sure where i'd be emotionally if we never became part of the military life. Whether i'd be on a happier path or not. I can't really dwell on that because any form of life will always put you on a turbulent coaster. I really don't have anything else to compare it to as an adult. It's all i've known now since the day I moved out of my parents house. I'm sure civilian life is full of just as much up and downs and unknowns.
The counselor has been really helpful. Definitely enlightening me on some of my personal struggles. Not saying everyday is easier after his help. Nothing changes so easily overnight but I certainly see a difference in my daily perception checks. I don't know how many sessions i get with him. We just had #3 or 4. I went in for stress relief and he took me on a different route a little deeper than I was aiming for but I guess there are roots you have to work at to fix the more outer problems.
In other news, I've gotten into yet another hobby. For some reason Crochet has been put on the back burner since Rob left. It's like he left and my ambition for it went with it. I do still crochet here an there through the week but nothing like I usually do. I know it'll probabl pick back up once life is back to normal when he returns. For now though...i've gotten into...
Most of those I found online (google and pinterest). Just search Free Printable Mandala's. There are tons out there. I also snagged a book at a local craft store. My medium for coloring are colored pencils. Some use water color paints or markers. Markers would be brighter if your going for a bolder look. I may try them in the future.
Today i've decided that I will try to make my own. I googled a bunch of video's for beginning Mandala drawing and now I want to attempt it. I'll be heading out soon to snag some markers, protractor and pens.
Mandala's are great art therapy. It is a form of meditation when you do them without distractions (ahem..turn off the tv). I listen to music when I'm coloring mine unless i feel music is even to distracting then I just sit in silence and focus on what i'm doing. I find this clears my mind even more than crochet does. Heck...crochet is more a time of mental reflections. I think a lot when i'm crocheting. Something about Mandala's doesn't. Maybe because it takes more concentration? Eitherway this is my point of focus at the moment once kiddo is down for the night. This is what's getting me through the deployment in peace.